Hargis Adoption

Can you S-P-E-L-L?

2007-03-11T10:41:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone - from the wayward blogger. I can't believe it's already March 11th! Where has the time gone? I think I'll be asking that question for the next 20 years.

Scott continues to grow and is the happiest boy I've ever seen. He has his bad days - he's a toddler after all. His hair is really coming in and he loves to spend time outside. He's learning to walk on uneven surfaces and is fascinated by the creek running behind our house. Yesterday Dave took him through the woods and let him put his fingers in the running water. He kept them there until the hand turned red from the cold water, but he loved it. He had this grin on his face and jabbered at the water. We each held a hand and let him walk through the woods. I wish you could see the expressions on his at each new experience. I think he's going to love being in the woods as much as we do.

The reason I asked if you can s-p-e-l-l is because the little guy is learning to understand English. I'm amazed that he's really comprehending what we're saying after months of looking at us blankly. There are certain words he knows and even says - go, out, up, cook (short for cookie) and of course the continuing favorite - cat. Callie has been replaced in the number one slot this week by the new word "duck." He wanders around playing and saying "duck" frequently. Today I told him we were going to visit Grandma and Grandpa and he needed to get his shoes. He lit up and ran looking for them. He used to fight putting shoes on and now he can't wait.

Dave and I have both been sick for the past few weeks. It's a nasty virus that for me blossomed into a bad infection. We're coughing and blowing but I think I've got the worst of it behind me. I'm still trying to talk him into seeing a doctor. It's hard to be sick with Scott around because he doesn't understand. Mommy should be able to run and play - and he gets this confused look on his face when I can't. I don't want to scare him, so I really tried to keep up. It's good to have my energy back! He's been pretty healthy - just the usual colds. Let's hope that holds.

We've all got Spring fever and these lovely days this weekend have been a blessing. The bulbs are starting to poke up from the ground and we could even see a tiny crocus bloom in Grandpa's sidewalk garden in front of their house. I told Scott that he's just going to love the springtime - and I'm looking out the window each day in anticipation of that first hint of the green that means it's really here.

The other morning there were 2 deer near the house when we got up. I held Scott and Callie looked out the window at them with us. We all quietly watched them as they nibbled the dry brown grasses and wandered away into the neighbor's backyard. Scott was fascinated and frankly I love seeing these creatures up close - except when they are eating our trees and flowers!

I think the biggest challenge to come will be keeping our little explorer close. He's getting so fast!

Hope everyone is well. :-)

Baptism!

2007-02-17T19:59:00.000-08:00

I do apologize for the delay in updating the website. I'm still getting used to this schedule and the many demands on my time. I just e-mailed a good friend and told her that by the time we get Scott in bed at night, I just want to put my feet up and relax. After spending all day at a computer, this is not high on my list of things I want to do.

So it's Saturday night and I'm feeling up to a quick posting for friends and family. Scotty is being baptized tomorrow morning! We had to postpone from a December date due to 20 inches of snow and both of us being sick (poor Dad). We've had more snow this week, but not enough to stop this one. We'll be surrounded by family and friends and it's going to be a wonderful ceremony. My friends in the music group have some great songs planned and BW is going to cantor the psalm. She sang at our wedding too - so how perfect is that? I even got to select a few songs for the day.

We have our first follow up visit next week with the social worker. She's going to prepare the report to go to Russia letting them know how Scott is doing. He's doing so well I'm not worried about it all. We have great reports from our Parents as Teachers rep, our pediatrician and others, plus when you see him you know he's such a happy, healthy boy. We are very blessed! Our babysitter commented that he's the happiest baby all the time. Not long after she said that, we endured an incredibly fussy, grumpy boy for the evening, so she may have jinxed me. Ha! Actually, she's right. He's usually in a good mood and except when he's sick - he's happy.

He's started saying words and said one today that was clear as a bell. We'd had a small snack of some crackers and juice and I had put the crackers away after we shared a few. He was in his room playing and he looked up and said "cracker." I asked him if said "cracker" and he said "yeah" in return. I said okay and he took off for the kitchen. How cool is that?! He's been saying words and repeating things we say (time to watch it!) but that's the first real exchange we've had like that. I followed him in and gave him another cracker and that's all he needed. Then it was back to playing.

I've spoken to several women lately who are on a waiting list for an adoption. I can remember how sad and depressed I was at this time last year because the situation looked so bleak. I know that whatever I say to them isn't the kind of comfort I'd hope it could be because I have my son and they don't have their child yet. I can remember praying so much last year and wondering why the prayers just weren't being answered. Tonight I know that God had Scott picked out for us and we just had to wait until the timing was right. That's not the kind of thing I would have wanted to hear at this time last year, but now I know how true it is. Thankfully He stayed with us and gave us strength to see it all through. Tomorrow morning we'll have the baptism we've dreamed about for years and my heart will be full of thanks for the God who brought us to it.

Well, I'd better get some sleep. It's going to be an early morning. Much love to everyone!

What a Night - actually several of them!

2007-01-14T08:59:00.000-08:00

Hello all.
We made it through the holidays and now we've made it over another big hurdle. Scott had his surgery to repair the hernia last Thursday. Poor baby - it's been tough on all of us. He's starting to go down for a nap right now, so I'm going to do a quick post to update you and then I'll have to run. I had thought about writing this as a retrospective - as if I were years in the future and looking back on a difficult time in Scott's childhood, but I'm too tired to be that creative. Sigh.

We did the pre-op meetings on Wednesday afternoon. It's strange because I was always concerned that I wasn't asking the right questions or I might be missing something. It's hard to concentrate when you've got a wiggling, giggling, whining toddler to hang on to. Thankfully we were both there and between the two of us, we got all of the necessary information. We were told to come back at 9 the next morning for the surgery.

When we got home, there was a phone message saying that another surgery had been postponed and that we were to be there at 7AM. I was actually relieved because I didn't want to have to explain to the baby why he couldn't have breakfast when he wanted it. We were up and moving by 5AM on Thursday and all 3 of us arrived on time. Scott was a little confused by it all, but did okay until they started trying to take blood pressure readings, etc. He's a smart kid and figured out that something was going on. They let us stay with him and entertain him until it was time to take him back to the operating room. I was working hard to stay calm and relaxed because he feeds off of our emotions. I had a rather surreal moment when a guy I knew from community theatre years ago walked in and said hi. He had retired from teaching and is now a medical technician. He was going to be working in Scott's operating room and was surprised to see me. I haven't seen him since I got married (11 years ago), but it was nice to see a friendly face at that time. He gave me a hug and was there when they took Scott away. I saw Scott going in to the operating room and a little bare foot had escaped the peach-colored hospital gown. I had a lump in my throat when I saw that tiny little foot. He looked so vulnerable!

We spent the next hour in the waiting room drinking coffee and eating a muffin. I was trying to focus on the Parenting magazine I'd brought but I kept staring at the clock on the wall. I called a few folks on my cell phone and did some praying too. It was a huge relief when the assistant came and told us that the doctor would be out shortly. We met with the doctor and he assured us that everything went very well. He said we'd be brought back when Scott was coming out of the anesthesia.

Seeing him lying on that gurney all groggy and confused is a sight I'll never forget. They got him up and in my lap under a warm blanket and he cried a bit out of confusion and hunger. He downed 8 ounces of pedialite very quickly and another 6 ounces of formula. They were amazed at what a good eater he is! We got the IV out and were soon told he could come home. He slept alot on Thursday.

Friday started out fine - he played and ate well throughout the day. Friday night - not so good. He cried and ran a fever and we did everything we could to try to make him comfortable and get the fever down. We called the urologist on call for the weekend and he made some suggestions. Scott just got worse about taking the liquid medication (lots of spitting it back out) and any kind of fluids (ditto). We were up regularly throughout the night.

Saturday morning, he didn't want to eat and the fever kept spiking. We tried everything we could think of - especially in light of the ice storm coming down all weekend. The last thing we wanted to do was go out in it with a sick baby. By 3PM on Saturday, the fever was nearly 103 and when we called the hospital, they wanted to see him. We got everything ready that we could think of - got ourselves ready and drove very carefully. By 4PM, we were at the ER and checking in.

He was so lethargic and fevered - I can't even describe the fear I felt. They said he wasn't dehydrated and his wounds looked good. They wanted to check for a bladder infection, so they needed a urine sample. They have an interesting little back to tape to that particular area of an infant. The nurse helped us force some motrin into him, and showed us another technique to help get the medicine in. She said she has a 15 month old baby and that's what she has to do as well. The doctor made some suggestions about how to alternate the motrin and tylenol to keep the fever down and that was good too. Then we settled in to wait for the urine sample. You can't tell a baby to pee. He just has to do it.

We also managed to get about 3 ounces of formula into him and did our best to entertain him. It was amazing to feel the fever start to come down and to see him perk up. He was limp in my arms when we brought him in and sitting up looking around when we carried him out 4 hours later. There was no sign of infection and the incisions were fine. What a relief.

We were starving and decided to get a different flavor of motrin in case that was part of the problem (it's not - we're still having trouble getting him to take medication). We went home past a Steak and Shake, so we went through the drive thru and got some burgers and fries. Scotty seemed interested in food, so I sat in the back seat with him and gave him a few bites of fries. He really liked them! I read somewhere to hang on to good moments and memories when things aren't going well. I'm never going to forget watching him in his snowsuit in the carseat as we travelled the ice covered roads and listening to the sleet hitting the windshield. Dave got us home safely and we bundled him in the house. He still seemed hungry, so I warmed up some mac and cheese and he ate about half of what was left - a good portion. He didn't like cold fries, so we skipped those. He then took about 4 ounces of formula and went to sleep. He woke up at 2:30AM and drank nearly a full bottle of formula. He settled back to sleep. There was no temperature at all then - thank God.

He awoke again at 6:30 to a pretty wet diaper and discomfort. I changed him and he didn't really want any juice or breakfast. Hi temp was up a little and we "convinced" him to take some motrin. He just seemed to want to sleep, so we all went back to bed and slept until 8:30AM. The exhausted parents were particularly grateful. He woke up happier than I'd seen him in days. He had a good breakfast and is trying to take a morning nap now. He keeps doing what we call the "black and decker" chorus - a drilling noise combined with singing and fussing. He's tired and wants to sleep, but doesn't want to sleep if you know what I mean. I'm going to take a few moments and catch a shower now that Dad is finished with his.

Thanks for all of the nice e-mails and support. Scott is going to be fine - I can see that now. It's just something that you have to get through and pray for the best. We'll keep doing that!

Much love and good wishes to all!
Anna

Merry Christmas!

2006-12-25T18:18:00.000-08:00

Since we finalized the adoption, so many people have said "You know you'll have the best Christmas this year." Guess what - they were right! It's about 8:15PM and we've finished our bath/bedtime routine. He's in his crib and I'm listening to him through the baby monitor. He alternates between his "drilling" noise - a noise he makes when he's falling asleep - and babbling to Tigger and the mobile. He clicks and babbles and giggles and I wish I knew what he was talking about. He does eventually fall asleep and is great about sleeping through most of the nights.

He's had a great Christmas so far and we've got one more day of fun. We're going to see my folks tomorrow and after speaking to them today, I know we'll have a fun day. Unfortunately, my Mom was very sick last week with a stomach bug, so we had to change our original plan of going down today and spending the night with them. She's better and feeling up to company, so we're going there during morning nap and coming back during afternoon nap. Then some friends are passing through and coming over for dinner before heading home. They have two kids who love to play with Scott - and vice versa. It should be a great day.

We've had 3 days of playing, baking cookies, wrapping presents and generally enjoying ourselves. We've spaced out the presents - some on Christmas Eve and some this afternoon so we wouldn't overwhelm him. Last night was a bit crazy - he was fussy and didn't quite get all of the presents and attention. Dave's folks came over and we had a lovely dinner, of which Scott didn't eat much. It's all food he's typically loved - ham, mashed potatoes, green beans - but lately he's not been as interested in dinner. He ate some, but not nearly what he'd normally eat. I ended up making him some rice cereal, and he gobbled that up. He did it again tonight - once again rejecting a meal he used to love. Go figure. I'm hoping that once we get back on a regular schedule he'll get back to eating normally again. We're trying to maintain his schedule, but that's not always easy to do during the holidays.

There were some truly wonderful moments this weekend. My mother-in-law and I made cookie-press Christmas tree cookies and they turned out perfectly. The look on Scott's face when he was riding his new rocking horse. The delight on my father-in-law's face when Scott walked right into his arms and giggled. Dave telling me something really funny and Scott starting to laugh because I was laughing. Watching Scott see more new toys this afternoon and shaking his arms and gasping with excitement. Callie letting Scott chase her and even "catch" her tail a bit - and his shouts of joy when he did . Playing with both of them because the furry baby is getting a little jealous of the bald kitty. I made up a game where I trot through the house with her purple string while holding Scott. He giggles as we dart around corners and she comes racing after us to catch the toy. It requires balance, quick manuevering and strength. It's really building up my upper body strength - although it's a game I can't play for very long. He's getting heavier!

I'll admit that this Christmas has been one of the very best ever. It's not exactly what I expected in some ways. I guess I don't really know what I expected. I've just tried to enjoy each and every moment. I'm seeing Christmas through his eyes - all of the wonder and joy and that has been delightful. We gave Scott "The Polar Express" book and while he did look at the pictures with me, he's too little to enjoy the story. I took a bit this afternoon while he was napping to sit down and re-read that story and it brought tears to my eyes. If you don't know the story - a little boy is selected to take a special train to the North Pole with many other children. He gets picked to receive the first Christmas gift from Santa and he asks for one of the silver bells from the reindeers' harness. Santa gives it to him and it makes the most beautiful noise. Unfortunately, when he's back on the train, he finds out there is a hole in his pocket. The bell was lost and he was devestated. The next morning, there's an extra present under the tree - and the bell is inside. Santa left him a note saying he'd found it in his sleigh. His parents think the bell is broken because they can't hear it ringing. As people age and stop believing in Santa, they stop being able to hear the bell - except for some lucky people who never lose the ability.

For the first time in a very long time, I could really hear that bell ringing. There's a beautiful little boy who just fell asleep upstairs and he's the one who has helped me hear it once more. This Christmas has been wonderful - but I'm definitely looking forward to many more!

Holiday Rush

2006-12-09T13:50:00.000-08:00

Hello all...
Here's a quick Saturday afternoon post while Scotty is napping. He's actually starting to wake up, so I'll make it brief. He is still doing great, despite having his first cold with us last week. He starting sneezing and coughing a week ago Wednesday, and I managed to follow him by a day or so. We got hit with 17 inches of snow (which is unusual!) last Friday and spent the unexpected 3 day weekend snowed in. Thankfully we had plenty of food on hand. We never lost power like some folks, for which I am also grateful. We were supposed to have Scott's baptism on Sunday, but that had to be cancelled since we couldn't get out and we were both sick. Dave managed to dig us out by Sunday afternoon and we were back in business on Monday morning. Scott recovered from his cold nicely, but mine turned into a sinus infection and I had to get antibiotics this week. I'm feeling better today - finally!

One thing I guess I didn't expect is the "Mommy guilt" when I'm sick. Dave was great about taking care of Scott and me, but I kept feeling guilty that I couldn't physically do as much. It's really a strange feeling. Logically, I knew that I needed to rest and that Dave could handle it all, but emotionally I felt bad. Weird.

He's taking five or six steps on his own now and he gets so excited when he does it. I just love his laughter. He giggles and laughs so much now and it's such a joy to hear. In the morning he's generally pretty happy, even when we've got to get out in the cold to go to daycare. He loves it there too. There are so many fun kids and great toys that he's worn out by the end of the day. Our provider tells us how happy he is and how much the other kids love playing with him. It's great to hear.

He's eating like a horse too. We took him to a fun diner last night along with Grandma and Grandpa and he was fascinated by the Christmas decorations. He had a kids meal of grilled cheese and mashed potatoes and really put the food away. Afterwards we came back and decorated the Christmas tree. He went to bed before we were finished, so he saw the finished product this morning. He had a huge smile on his face and seemed to really think it's cool. This morning I made pancakes and he helped Dad and I clean the house. Well, sort of. He didn't make a bigger mess before we could get the chores done, so that's good! We had friends over this afternoon for lunch and he played and had a great time with them.

I can hear him waking up, so I'd better head that way. We may go out for some shopping this evening. All in all - a great day so far! Now if I can just get all that Christmas shopping done........

The best Thanksgiving!

2006-11-26T18:58:00.000-08:00

I can't believe how the time has flown by. I'm heading back to work tomorrow, and we'll begin our new routine. It's going to be busy and I know I'll miss being with Scott and Dave all day. We've tried out the daycare and Scott loves it. I think it will be harder on me! It's so hard to believe it's been 5 weeks!

We had an amazing Thanksgiving with Dave's folks and my parents. Scott received so much attention and you wouldn't believe how much food he ate. I thought he'd go into a food coma, but he loved the mashed potatoes, the stuffing, the green bean casserole and his Grandma's pumpkin pie (but only a small amount of that!). He's a good eater and is even feeding himself certain things. Green beans are a hit, as are peas and carrots.

There is a good chance that Scott will be the most photographed and videotaped child in history. My Dad got a video camera for his birthday and he had a ball taking video of Scott and the rest of us. Scott is practically walking on his own, and it's so fun to have him take 4 or 5 steps between me and Dave. The joy on his face is priceless. He's a changed boy - as everyone said he would be. He laughs so much and sings and plays. The bonding between the 3 of us is going so very well. If anything, he's kind of clingy to me, but I think that's normal at this age.

One of my favorite things is when we get up in the morning. He's so warm and cuddly and he rests his head on my shoulder and cuddles with me. I could just stay that way for hours, but this busy boy has places to go and people to see! It doesn't last long, but it's so precious.

I love this baby boy more every time I see him. He's the miracle we've waited for more than 10 years! When he throws himself into my arms when we're playing, or rests his head on my shoulder, I realize that all of that pain and waiting and frustration and sadness was worth the end result. I wish my words would convey that hope to everyone who is waiting, but I know that the words are hollow. I remember reading about successful adoptions and being happy for those couples, but it's not the same thing as knowing that you've got a baby. The pain that we went through is still there - and I can empathize with everyone who is still waiting. While I can't remove that pain for them, I hope that God will bring you peace and strength as He did for me and Dave through this process.

My folks and Dave's folks told us that this was the best Thanksgiving ever. I tend to agree. We're building such wonderful memories - it's just too bad that the days fly by so quickly. I'm trying to take time to enjoy each and every moment.

Peace and good wishes to all!
Anna

Hello from Kitsie Callie

2006-11-14T09:37:00.000-08:00

I asked Mom if I could add to her blog and she said it would be okay. I'm Kitsie Callie, the original baby in the Hargis household. I'm a big kitty - 2 years old - and I thought I'd share my opinion of the bald kitty that they recently brought home.

Until 3 weeks ago, I was the princess of the household and pretty much had two of the big kitties at my beck and call. Then they took one of their vacations and were gone for a whole week. I was irritated, but very glad when they got home. Much to my surprise, they weren't alone. They brought the bald kitten with them. He's kind of noisy with big eyes and while I wasn't too happy at first, I think I actually like him now. As long as Mom or Dad is close by, I'll even let him touch my paw or tail - but otherwise, we don't get too close. I've seen how he shakes toys, so I'm keeping my distance.

This has increased my security duties significantly. I find that I have to watch him frequently, even when he's sleeping. I curl up and stand watch to make sure nothing bad comes near him. It may look like I'm napping, but I'm ever vigilant as any good cat should be. I'm not always happy when we have company, and we've had lots since the bald kitty arrived. I have to check all of them out, especially anyone who holds him. If they don't meet with my approval, I let Mom know. After all, you can never be too careful with your baby kitties, can you?

One really good thing...the introduction of more interesting television viewing. We have something called a Baby Einstein DVD with lots of animals. The cats aren't nearly as cute as I am, but the bald kitty and I both really like to watch that one. We both talk to the TV, and I've told him directly several times what each animal is, but he doesn't make the cat sounds quite right yet. I'll work with him on it.

He's walking with help, and our new game is to have Mom or Dad help him walk and he chases me throughout the upstairs. When I get tired, I jump up on something and swish my tail. Everyone seems to understand that signal. It's hard to train big kitties, but you have to stick with it. They do learn eventually.

Bath time is fascinating. The bald kitten likes to play in his duck tub now. I didn't like the noises he made when Mom tried to give him a bath at first. He wasn't very happy and he made noises like what I might make if someone put me in water. He's okay with it now though and makes unhappy noises when you take him out of the water. Go figure.

He likes to nap during the day, although not as long as me. The big kitties don't nap and sometimes make noise, but we're learning to deal with it. Dad put out the bird feeder, and I have lots of critters to "chup" at now. I'm trying to teach the bald kitty about chups, but he doesn't quite get it yet.

Mom and Dad took the bald kitty for a long weekend to San Antonio this past weekend. I got to stay home in the peace and quiet and had the whole house to myself. That was nice for a day or so, but then I missed my family and wanted them to come home. Even that strange new kitty. When they came back, I greeted them all enthusiastically at the door. It's good to have everyone home.

Anyway, it's time to nap, so I'm going to run. Maybe Mom will let me put another entry in later. She and Dad seem pretty happy, so I guess this new kitty will work out in our family. He does make life interesting. Meow!

Home Sweet Home!

2006-11-01T09:59:00.000-08:00

Hello all!
It's hard to believe we're home with Scott and all is well, but it's true. I apologize for not being more prompt in my posting, but the adjustment to this new life has been something else. To top it off, my first attempts at adjusting a car seat led to a painful bending back of my right thumb nail. It was so bad, the darn thing bled and throbbed for two days. I couldn't write or type with it, so thus the delay.

Let's see - where to begin. I won't give you all of the details of the trip to get him. Dave and I became zombie people with little sleep in no time. Overall - there were no problems in the trip there or getting to Niznhny Novgorad. We met up with another woman and her friend who were travelling to pick up her son. For the sake of privacy, I'll refer to them as F and M - F is the new Mom - and she's a single woman who has a gorgeous new son in her life. M is someone who had used our agency twice before with her husband and they have two gorgeous kids. I asked her if she was going for a trip merit badge - she's got to have a record at making this trip a total of 5 times! It was so great to have an experienced mom with us because as you know, these small beings don't come with an instruction manual. For everyone who told me "trust your instincts" I thank you. You are so right about that! You can start to read his moods and gestures and you just know what he needs!

We did get a little sightseeing in that afternoon before boarding the train. We walked around Red Square and saw St. Basil's cathedral. It was a lovely afternoon and my eyes kept wandering to the families with children who were there. I kept thinking about Scott and how we would be with him that very next day. We then headed to the train station and off to NN. The agency folks got us where we needed to be and were so amazing on this trip!!

We were up early on Monday morning and ready to go. The judge has required all families to see the children once more before court, so we made the 3 hour round trip first thing Monday. We saw him for about 20 minutes and leaving him was almost as hard as it was the first trip. I got choked up, even though I knew I'd be back that day. I think there was a part of me that was afraid something would go wrong.

We got back to NN early and had some hot tea and blintzes before court. I can't post what happened in court because it's private and closed, but suffice it to say we had a happy ending. Dave and I held on to each other while the judge gave us custody of this beautiful baby boy. It was a dream come true. F had received custody in the hearing before ours, so we all went to lunch to celebrate. Then we piled into our respective cars and made the return trip to get our boys.

When we arrived in his town we were encouraged to take some photos of their new train station and the church associated with the hospital. We also took photos of the hospital's new wing. We then went in to pick him up. The doctor's were ready with information about his schedule, immunizations and took the clothes and diaper I brought to change him for the trip. Everyone was waiting to say goodbye to him and several of the caregivers were emotional. The one that touched me the most was the nurse who reached out and touched his little hand, whispered something and then left in tears. It was good to know that they loved him like that.

Even though it was about 50 degrees outside, we had him bundled for an artic winter. I carefully carried him down the stairs and outside, and I saw his eyes widen in fear as we walked outside. We settled quickly in the car and he kept a death grip on my index finger with one hand and another death grip on Dave's finger with the other hand. He seemed to like riding in the car though and we basically just held him and let him look at us and out the window.

When we got back to NN we settled in our hotel room briefly and packed up our stuff. We then went down to dinner where he and F's baby had a grand time giggling and playing. Scott was just having a ball! We went back to the room to wait for the time to leave for the night train. He drank his bottle with no problem and we got some great video of him playing and interacting with a mirror.

The night train to Moscow was rough. He kept waking up, but I had curled up around him to keep him on the sleeping bench. Dave took a turn too, so I could sleep a bit. About 3AM, Scott woke up in terror - just screaming. We comforted him and settled him back to sleep. All 3 of us zonked out from then until 6am. When we arrived in Moscow we were whisked off to the medical clinic and the trauma of having blood drawn. Poor baby. That was no fun for any of us. We had one more stop to drop off paperwork and then got to the hotel. Our room was ready (thank God!) and the three of us collapsed in bed for a nap. We all woke up much happier and ready for dinner. M, F and her son met us in the restaurant and they had some great high chairs for the boys. We had a really nice dinner and the babies were so good! We made it an early evening. Unfortunately Dave and I both had a bought of insomnia from 2AM to 4AM. We sprang for a half bottle of wine from the mini bar and talked quietly until we finally fell asleep.

The next day, we had an appointment at the Embassy at 1PM. We were able to relax and have a late breakfast. Scott likes to people watch, so he was good while we ate. We started to fall into a rhythm of anticipating his needs for food, diaper changes and naps and started calling him Travelling Scotty because he's really a good traveller. After the Embassy appointment, we went back to the hotel for a nap for him and packing for us. Another nice meal in the restaurant for dinner and then early to bed. We were again awake from 2AM to 4AM, but in my case it's because of an unfortunate stomach malady. Suffice it to say that the bathroom in the Marriott is very nice. I spent quite a bit of time there.

Thursday morning had us up and running for the airport. It's a big blurry day for me because my stomach acted up every now and then - although blessedly not on the long airplane ride. Moscow to Atlanta - 11 1/2 hours - Scott slept about 3 of those, but was really pretty good. He fussed a bit, but really didn't scream like I was afraid he would. He had a bottle with the take off and slept through the landing.

It's a great moment knowing that when we landed he became an American citizen. We went through INS and customs and again, as a zombie I don't remember too much. We then went to wait for the trip to St. Louis. Scott zonked out on Daddy's lap as soon as we settled in our seats and slept through the whole trip. My stomach went nuts again, and I was miserable the whole trip. Thankfully, it's only 90 minutes.

The agency folks met us at the airport and took us to the hotel where we collapsed. Our big bag didn't make it from Atlanta, so I was without my cosmetics or hair stuff. Thursday I didn't care, but on Friday I looked at myself in horror at one point. Yikes - talk about letting yourself go!

We took our baby home on Friday and it was so good to see that familiar place! Our cat Callie wasn't too sure about the baby and they are still eyeing each other like wary allies. They want to be friends, but they just aren't too sure. Callie has started rolling around near Scott and showing off her playing skills. He laughs and stares at her, but isn't ready to try touching her yet. That's probably good.

We had our first pediatrician visit Monday and a follow up today. Our son is healthy and only slightly behind where he should be. Thank God! He even managed to gain 11 ounces while we were travelling. He took off crawling around the house this morning with us and and he's going to be ready to walk soon. He hasn't turned up his nose at food either.

Everyone said life would change - and it has. The people who got it right were the ones who said it would change for the better. When I hold him and stare into those gorgeous eyes, I feel that all is right with the world. Even when he needs a bottle at 4AM, it's amazing to hold that warm little body and feel the love just filling me up. I didn't know it was possible to feel helpless and powerful at the same time until he grasps my hand. We're both feeling very protective and I find myself putting his needs above everything - which of course is the right thing to do.

Life has changed - but what a lovely new adventure this is! We've been blessed by God with this handsome, curious and wonderful baby boy. I just can't even describe how amazing that feels. Another fabulous moment - introducing him to two sets of doting grandparents. I can tell he's going to love them as much as they already love him! We had such fun over the weekend with grandparents and I can't wait to get together with them again soon.

Many thanks to the family and friends who have brought food and presents and generally doted on our boy. We had a wonderful visit with a group of close friends on Sunday afternoon, another fun time with some friends and their kids on Sunday night, and a super Halloween party last night. This boy likes his parties! We're going to have a quiet night tonight to catch up after all of this fun and those yucky immunization shots we had today. I hope to post again soon - barring any more unfortunate injuries. Watch out for those car seats!

Later!

2 Weeks Left!

2006-10-08T06:10:00.000-07:00

It's Sunday morning and I'm at my folk's house for the weekend. Dave had a shoot for a client, so he couldn't come with me. We're celebrating my birthday (which is the 12th) and I'm having a terrific time. Yesterday, Mom took me on a shopping spree and it was terrific. We had a great salesperson who helped find sizes and even selected an outfit that we eventually purchased - slacks, sweater and shoes! When was the last time you had that good a shopping experience?

We went to Mass and then went to this incredible restaurant. The view is stunning and the meal was one of those incredible ones that makes "foodies" like us drool. We had a great time laughing and telling stories - the only down side is that Dave wasn't with us. The tables are pretty close together in this restaurant, and proud Grandpa had some photos with him. He showed everyone from the owner of the restaurant to the folks at the next two tables. They were delighted and as usual - they knew someone who had adopted! It's amazing how many people you run into know someone who has adopted either domestically or through a foreign country. They were so excited for us and genuinely enthusiastic. I love my Dad's ability to meet people and talk to them effortlessly. It's truly a gift.

I told Mom that I noticed she had put a small Christmas ornament on one of my baby shower packages. I hadn't noticed it when I first opened the package, but later when I was going through it, I saw the little white bear. I had tears in my eyes, because I realized what she had done. Years ago when she was given a baby shower for me, one of the packages had a small pink angel decoration on it. She used it as a decoration on the Christmas tree - and for years she told me it was "my special angel." Every year, I looked for it on the tree, and was delighted each time I found it. To this day I still look for the little pink angel near the top of her gorgeous Christmas tree! She has so many lovely ornaments collected from various travels and gifts from friends and her tree is huge and elegant, but every year she carefully places this worn little ornament near the top for me. I'm looking forward to starting that tradition for our son and place his little "angel bear" near the top of our Christmas tree for many years to come. Thanks Mom!

Today we're going to do some more shopping and then I'll head home. With only 2 weeks left before we leave - we've got plenty to do!

Catch up

2006-09-28T17:59:00.000-07:00

Hello all!
It's been awhile, but every night I have a "to do" list that seems to grow faster than I can mark items off. I'm suffering from some "blog guilt" because I haven't updated this as much as I'd like to.

Last Sunday, Christine, Barb and Anne put together an amazing baby shower. 20 of my friends plus my Mom and Dave's Mom were there, and there were so many gifts for Scott that I couldn't believe it! The gifts were clever, thoughtful, generous and absolutely perfect. Most of all, it was great to be surrounded by such loving and supportive women. You can never have too many girlfriends! Thank you all!!!

Dave has been busy on projects around the house, and we both visited several daycare options. We found a perfect one - and I'm so thrilled that she has an opening starting in November when we need it. As always, God provides whatever we need - and he seems to have listened to my prayers for a caring person to help in this area. For privacy, I'll not mention her name, but suffice it to say I'm thrilled.

Dave is also becoming a very protective Dad. Some of you have requested photos of Scott, and we're going to hold off posting those. The recent kidnapping of the newborn in St. Louis really shocked us, and while I know that the vast majority of those reading this are wonderful loving people, there are predators out there. For family and friends - send me an e-mail and I'm happy to forward a photo via e-mail to you. I hope everyone understands our concerns.

We're working on our court statements, updating our wills, childproofing the house and organizing Scott's room. I'm still writing thank you notes to friends from Sunday's shower, so I need to run and finish that up. Many thanks to those of you who have posted!

Love,
Anna

What Fun!

2006-09-12T18:58:00.000-07:00

It's late, so I'll just add a quick post. Christine, Barb and I went to register for our baby shower this evening after work. I did some research and "interviewed" several friends including Shelly and Elizabeth who were wonderful! They have kids close to our son's age and knew what to suggest.

It was still overwhelming. By day, I was a competent career woman - Tonight - a confused crazy person running around zapping at items in a store with a scanner. I lost count of how many times I stared at merchandise in complete and total confusion. So many cute clothes and toys - and who knew there were so many types of diapers! I'm supposed to get formula for the trip that doesn't have iron. Good luck with that folks! I was at Target, but I'll try the grocery store to see what they've got. Barb had to leave, so Chris and I finished up. We did pretty well until we got to the whole baby wash/diaper thing. I just scanned a few items and crossed my fingers. I figure I'll live and learn on this one.

It's been wonderful sharing our journey with friends and family. I can't even describe the wonder of watching Dave's parents and my folks watch the video of their grandson for the first time. I was torn between watching the baby and watching their reaction - but it was magical and emotional. We've got four very excited grandparents who cannot wait to meet this little boy. It's a good thing he likes to be held!

Susan - thanks for the lovely verse you posted. It's one of my favorites!

Tired but Happy!

2006-09-08T15:24:00.000-07:00

Dave and I feel like zombies after the trip, but we're happy zombies.

Let's see - the last posting was from Russia with Love - so I'll catch you up a bit. We got to see our son again on Tuesday. They had dressed him in one of the outfits I had brought along and he looked so adorable. I don't know if he recognized us, but he didn't seem afraid.

We played for awhile - looking at a book, helping him with his efforts to walk, playing with legos. When it was time to go, I'll admit, I got a bit emotional. I already love holding him and just didn't want to let go. He must have noticed me starting to cry, and he definitely saw Dave helping to clean up the toys and that set him off. Up until then, he'd been pretty quiet, but he opened his mouth and let out a howl that turned into a watery scream. He cried big tears and just wailed for a few minutes. It shocked me out of my tears, and I started to tell him everything would be fine. One of the nurses came and took him and he started to calm down, so my last glimpse of him before we left had him in a much calmer frame of mind. They told us that he just didn't want us to leave and that's why he cried. Everyone was so very kind to us - and the head doctor even gave us each an apple for the ride back. Chris - this boy has a set of lungs on him - so we'll definitely have to teach him to sing! Maybe even some opera!

There's no way to prepare yourself for leaving after a visit like that. You know you'll be back in a few weeks, but it's still hard. I thought of my friend Rose's words after her first trip. She told me it would be hard, but they make it easier because you can see how much they care about these children. It's so true. I know they'll take good care of him until we can return and bring him home and that makes it easier. I've really been pretty dry-eyed about it every since, although I find myself staring at photos of him frequently and wondering what he's doing.

Another thing that helps is that we've got so much left to do! I keep making "to do" lists and every time I cross something off, I seem to think of two more things to add. As Mom always reminds me - One day at a time - and you'll get it all done. Very true.

We have our reservations for the second trip - just a few more details to work out there. It's going to be a fast few weeks before we leave and there is much to do.

I want to thank everyone who has posted on this blog. I'm enjoying hearing from other families who are going through this process. I know that you truly know how we feel and what we're experiencing. On the return flight, I saw a couple from Atlanta with their new daughter. She's gorgeous and was so full of energy. We talked for a little while and I tried to help entertain the child a bit. I could tell from the things they said that they knew what we were feeling and going through - just as I could relate to their journey. Thank you to everyone for your kind comments and support - and know that we send our thoughts and prayers with you.

I also want to say "hi" to the friends and family members who have posted. Imagine me grinning from ear to ear every time I read those posts. I can just feel your love shining through.

I hope I'm not too disjointed with this posting. I'm so very tired! More to come though - not to worry.

What a day!

2006-09-04T07:59:00.000-07:00

We met our son for the first time today and we signed the papers to proceed with the adoption. I don't have much time because this is a public computer, so I'll keep the posting brief. We'll post photos later. When they brought him in the room, I was overwhelmed with emotion. They handed him to me and he settled in my arms and just stared. He has huge, beautiful eyes. The caretakers are all women and they told us that Dave and our translator were the first men he'd ever seen. He was fascinated and a little hesitant at first with Dave. He got over that quickly and was moving toward him at every opportunity. He can walk with support and this little guy has got a grip! He gets ahold of your fingers and just clenches his little fist. He's very small, but he has two teeth on top and two on the bottom. He smiled and laughed several times while we played with him, but he was a little tired. Apparently he has the start of a cold or something. Later when they were asking if we wanted to adopt him, they asked me what I thought. I responded that "I think I'm in love!" We both are. We got lots of photos and video and can't wait to share it with family and friends.

We have a son. And he's wonderful. We get to see him again tomorrow and then we begin the long journey home. Leaving him today was difficult, but tomorrow will be really tough. We have to leave him while the paperwork is finalized and then we'll be back to pick him when we receive our court date. Hopefully that will be very soon. Everyone here has been very professional and yet very warm and welcoming to us. It makes me look forward to returning to this lovely country very soon. Dave has commented and I agree that this area of Russia looks like our favorite parts of Minnesota. We feel right at home.

Got to run. Dave is giving me the "wrap" signal. Much love to all!!!!

Pulling Paperwork

2006-08-28T18:04:00.000-07:00

The response to the blog has been wonderful! I appreciate the supportive comments from other families who have "been there, done that" and hearing from friends and family is terrific! Great to hear from you Susan - I was hoping Dad would forward the blog address. Hope all is well with your clan!

The Russian text has got to be from Dad. I stared at it this morning in wonder and tried to figure out who would post and how could I translate it. Then I saw the word "grandparents" and realized it had to be Dad. It's so great to have parents on both sides who are as excited about this adoption as we are! We couldn't do it without your love!

I'm gathering paperwork tonight and carefully going through the "take this with you" list. I don't want to miss anything. I'd better get back to it. I still want to gather some other items for packing as well. Keep those comments coming. :-)

First Trip to Russia

2006-08-27T13:45:00.000-07:00

Hello everyone!

Dave and I have received several requests to start a blog about the adoption, the trips to Russia and this new adventure we're about to embark upon, so here we go!

First, we have to say thank you to everyone who has provided love, support, prayers, advice and good wishes during this journey. It's been a challenging and amazing time, and now that we're in the home stretch, it's very exciting.

For those of you who haven't been around since this adventure began, here's a quick synopsis...

Dave and I have been married for 11 wonderful years, and our attempts to have a child weren't successful. We worked with a specialist for a few years, but the treatment and surgeries didn't work. That's when we started researching adoption alternatives. We talked to families who had adopted, we read books, we read postings on-line and after all of that, we decided to try adopting a child from another country. Around Thanksgiving 2003, we started looking for an agency.

My friend Rose Lloyd had used an agency out of St. Louis called Future Adopt. She and her husband Mark adopted two beautiful girls from Russia, and she said that the agency did a terrific job. During the process, she heard horror stories from other couples, and she was very relieved that they didn't experience any of those problems. When we looked into it, going to Russia and working with this agency seemed like a good option for us.

We met with Carola and Galina in January of 2004. At the time, the process was taking about 12 to 18 months, and we decided to jump right in. When I saw the mountain of paperwork and bureacracy ahead of us, I remembered one of my favorite sayings/jokes: "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time." It took 7 months to finish that elephant - so many documents, 2 home study visits with the social worker Jodi, a trip to Kansas City for fingerprinting, etc. etc. We received our INS approval and went on the Russian waiting list on August 24, 2004.

We took the advice of other adoptive parents and kept busy through the rest of 2004 and the first half of 2005. We painted, organized, got new carpet, bought furniture and generally spruced up the place. I read books about parenting, subscribed to two magazines and dreamed about being a Mom. We moved up the list with an agonizing slowness, but at least it was moving.

Then, in June of 2005, something terrible happened. It came out in the media that 3 families - 2 in the US and one in Canada - had abused the children they had adopted from Russia. The abuse was so bad that the children died. The Russians government officials and the Russian people were justifiably upset. They began a process to update their foreign adoption laws and processes. At the time, we were told that it wouldn't take long - but long when you're waiting for a child is relative. We moved to the top of the list and Carola seemed to think we'd make our first trip in September, 2005. The adoptions in the pipeline were still moving through, despite the fact that their accrediting group was still waiting to be reaccredited.

In September, the Russian government said that any umbrella agency that had not yet received their accreditation could no longer use the temporary approval letter. This accreditation issue affected approximately 75% of the agencies doing business in Russia according to Carola and Galina. They made the decision not to send any other couples until the accreditation problem was fixed. At the time, they believed it would be a couple of months, so we decided to wait it out. After all, we were the next couple to go. If we had moved to another agency, we would have to go to the bottom of the list and start over.

In November 2005, our first expiration hit. The US only authorizes fingerprints for 15 months. That meant another half day of vacation to return to Kansas City and re-do the prints. My fingerprints are very hard to take - too much hand lotion and keyboarding! The techs didn't follow the same process as the first time through - where we were able to do everything in one trip. I asked several times if we could follow the same process, but was told that it had changed. 2 weeks later I got a letter saying I had to go back. My frustration bubbled over and I started calling and trying to get some answers. I finally got through to the right person, and he apologized. I still had to go back.

Christmas 2005 was difficult for us. We thought we would have had our son by then, and it's hard to go through a holiday season carrying that kind of disappointment around. There was no progress on accreditations in Russia and we started talking to Carola about the "independent" process. It wasn't our first choice because it involved making 3 trips rather than 2 trips to Russia and we wouldn't get as much information about the child. In January of 2006, we began to fear that they would close foreign adoptions permanently so we made the decision to try it. We called Carola and Galina over the weekend of Jan. 21st and 22nd. On the 23rd, Galina called Russia to get our paperwork moving and was told that the government had closed the independent process the Friday before. Yet another door closed on us. It was heart-breaking.

We stopped reading parenting books and magazines. We stopped working on the baby room. It was just too hard to do that when you didn't know if or when we'd get to go. We never stopped praying and we never gave up on our dream of adopting a child. We talked about starting over with another agency and going to another country, but we decided to trust Galina and Carola and what they were hearing from their contacts in Russia. Carola came and updated our home study herself and her encouragement was critical in helping us keep the faith.

Around Easter, we started getting some optimistic news. Several agencies had received their new accreditations - and Galina and Carola decided to try another option with a new accrediting group. The intitial talks went well, and the contracts were signed in late June, 2006. The wait was officially back on. Dave and I got new cell phones and provided Carola with every phone number she could possibly need to get in touch with us should the call come.

Thursday, August 3rd, 2006 is a day we'll never forget. I was in Los Angeles working on Shelter's new commercials. I had been there a week and was getting ready for our last - and longest - and most difficult day of shooting. At 7:15AM local time, my cell phone rang. I noticed it was from a St. Louis area code, and I figured it was another one of the wrong numbers I'd been receiving. Apparently the person who had my number last was from St. Louis and I was getting used to telling people he no longer had the number.

It wasn't a wrong number - it was Galina. My legs were wobbly as she told me that the referral had arrived, and that we had son waiting for us. All she knew at the time was that he was 11 months old and had beautiful eyes. All I could say was "Oh my God" and "Thank you." She promised more information later that day via e-mail. I immediately called Dave and told him the good news. He was a little more coherent with his "Oh...okay...wow!" I took another minute and called Mom and Dad at work. They both got on the line and it was a really wonderful phone call. I somehow managed to dry my hair, finish my makeup, dress and meet Larre Johnson for the shoot. I was floating with happiness and the 14 hour day flew by. At one point I fired up the laptop and utilized the wireless internet that the production folks had set up. I was sitting in one of the seats in the Los Angeles Theatre (incredible place - but falling apart) and saw the photo of my son for the first time. We were waiting for another shot to be set up, so I had some time. I can't describe the emotion of seeing that blurry photo for the first time. I have a print out of it here and it overwhelms me just remembering that moment. I remember I started to cry, and Larre leaned over, patted my shoulder and said something - sorry Larre - I can't remember what you said. I just know that it was good to have a colleague and a friendly face there with me on that day. It's surreal to get life-changing news when you're surrounded by strangers.

I had sent a quick e-mail to Carol Heim back at the office so that she could let everyone know. What I didn't know is that Carol had to go to a funeral that morning, so she hadn't seen my message or had a chance to share it. Later, when I got a message about our failed attempt to win megabucks as a group with the lottery, I replied back to everyone and said that getting the referral felt better than winning the lottery. Minutes later, my cell phone rang and Kristy Rowles asked me what I was talking about. Within another few minutes, everyone else from the Ad Team had punched into her line and we had a wonderful time going crazy over the good news. I could feel their enthusiasm and support through my little phone and it felt incredibly good.

When I got back home, we began a whirlwind of planning and organizing. Now I'm sitting here 3 weeks later and we have our airline tickets purchased, our visa arrived on Friday, and I still have lots to do to get ready to go - both at work and here at home. I just knew if I didn't take some time to get this posted, it wasn't going to happen.

The journey officially begins on Friday. We'll see our son for the first time on September 4th - Labor Day. We hope that the process goes smoothly and we'll be able to make the 2nd trip and pick him up in the middle of October.

In addition to getting to meet our son, we get to go overseas! We love to travel and the adventure of visiting a new country is a huge bonus in this process. We've been reading about the sights in Moscow and some of the history of Nizhny Novogorad - which is where the Baby Home is located. The city was founded in the early 1200's and I can't wait to see it!

We're taking a camcorder and a digital camera, so we'll share photos through this blog. We'll do our best to keep it updated - perhaps even while we're in Russia.

Again - so many thanks to everyone. Dave and I appreciate your support more than we can possibly say. Das Vadanya! Gee - I hope I spelled that right!